Doing vs. Being Confidence: How to Master Both for Career Growth and Impact

Self-doubt, playing smaller than you know you’re capable of, and imposter syndrome all tend to be constant, confusing companions to career growth and greater impact.  It’s a topic that comes up frequently in coaching. 

If you’ve been afflicted with any of these, you’re in surprisingly good company.  Sonia Sotomayor , Howard Schultz, Jody Foster, Maya Angelou, Tom Hanks, and Michelle Obama are just a few of the amazing, accomplished individuals who have confessed to fears of being ‘found out.’  Studies suggest that over 70% of people experience feeling like a fraud it various points in their career.

As we start to unravel this confidence conundrum (and unravel it you must if you want to grow your career and impact), it can be helpful to consider two types of confidence: 

DOING Confidence Vs. BEING Confidence

Each of these requires attention.

Each plays a significant career-building role.

But each requires something different to build.  

DOING confidence is grounded in growing competence and mastery. 

• To build DOING confidence, ACTION is required, along with a healthy dose of courage (to try new things) and hard work (to master your craft).  
• Preparation and practice are the name of the game. 
• External validators provide helpful information and markers of success. 
• DOING confidence builds as you accumulate a track record of effective performance.

BEING confidence is grounded in a sense of sufficiency (of being ENOUGH), and in your ability to love and accept yourself. 

• To build BEING confidence, SLOWING DOWN is required. 
• Listening, reflecting, and receiving are the muscles we need to strengthen.
• Breaking out of your negative story, inner critic, and limiting beliefs is the name of the game. 
• External validators are rarely helpful here, and often need to be ignored.
•  As you brave the internal journey of building BEING confidence, strengthening your ability to trust yourself, believe in yourself, and play full-out are the powerful skills you acquire.

Steps for Building DOING Confidence

1. Set a Clear Goal for Mastery
   Action Step: Identify an area in your career where you’d like to build more competence or mastery. Break it down into smaller, actionable goals that you can work on steadily.
   Reflection Question: What specific skills or knowledge do I need to develop to feel more confident in this area?
2. Take Action, Even When It Feels Uncomfortable
   Action Step: Choose one task or project that will challenge your current abilities and push you to step outside your comfort zone. Commit to completing it, even if it means making mistakes along the way.
   Reflection Question: What task can I take on today that will stretch my abilities and give me an opportunity to build my “doing confidence”?
3. Seek Constructive Feedback
   Action Step: Ask a trusted colleague or mentor to give you feedback on your performance in your area of focus. Use this feedback to refine your approach.
   Reflection Question: What feedback have I received recently that can help me grow and improve in my career?
4. Commit to Continuous Learning and Growth
   Action Step: Identify a course, workshop, or book that will help you advance your skills or knowledge in your field. Set a goal to complete it within a specific timeframe.
   Reflection Question: What new skill or area of knowledge could I invest in that would make me feel more competent in my role?
5. Increase Your Visibility and Seek Challenges
   Action Step: Volunteer for high-visibility projects or take on new responsibilities that allow you to showcase your growing competence. The more you demonstrate your abilities, the more your confidence will grow.
   Reflection Question: What opportunities can I take on that will challenge me and allow me to showcase my skills in front of others?

Steps for Building BEING Confidence

1. Practice Self-Reflection and Awareness
   Action Step: Set aside time each week for introspection or journaling. Reflect on the times when your inner critic shows up and how it affects your sense of self.
   Reflection Question: What negative stories do I tell myself about my worth, and how can I reframe them?
2. Develop a Daily Practice of Self-Compassion
   Action Step: Make a habit of speaking to yourself with kindness and understanding, especially when you make mistakes or face setbacks.
   Reflection Question: What is one area where I could be more compassionate with myself today? How can I be kinder to myself in challenging moments?
3. Challenge Limiting Beliefs
   Action Step: Identify one limiting belief you have about your abilities or worth. Write it down and actively counter it with evidence of past successes and your inherent strengths.
   Reflection Question: What beliefs or assumptions am I holding onto that are limiting my growth? How can I challenge these beliefs?
4. Cultivate Trust in Yourself
   Action Step: Start making decisions from a place of self-trust. When faced with a decision, pause, tune into your inner wisdom, and take aligned action.
   Reflection Question: How can I strengthen my trust in myself and my intuition in the decisions I make this week?
5. Embrace Your “Enoughness”
   Action Step: Commit to acknowledging your inherent worthiness every day. Whenever you feel the need to prove yourself or overcompensate, remind yourself that you are enough as you are.
   Reflection Question: In what areas of my life am I trying to prove my worth? How can I let go of the need for external validation?